Sunday, February 26, 2006

why I am not on american idol

oops, to those who had to sit through that last song of mine, I am still working out the kinks to this digital recorder, it downloaded the wrong version!

sorry for the noise!

look out for my next musical debut later today!

SG

take a walk in these souls and you will know me.

SHOE SALE- magic words in my mind....

What is the obsession?

When did it start?

My memory of shoes begins with a certain red yellow and blue pair of sneakers, with "left" and "right" written on the toes. I still have the left, it could barely hold my pinky today, yet I remember getting those shoes!
Next I remember the aubergine stiff as rocks, leather ones with the red and white shoelaces that were like thick bakery strings. Mom and I went with big sis SB to Joseph's in the Heights to get them. We sat on a wooden rocking horse while an old man slid my foot into a glistening metal contraption, like a ruler, but it's numbers were much more magical. Over the years, I'd watch in glee as my big toe inched up past the lines as I stood up to measure. Progress! Soon I would be in big girl shoes!

Now here's where the story takes a turn... ( thanks for reading along)

My Bubby and Zaydee, may they with Hashem's help, each be granted 120 years, are holocaust survivors.
My shoe obsession is therefore true gluttony, Jewish Guilt turns my stomach.
It is an addiction I try to hide from them, which is pretty hard, as I eat shabbos with them almost weekly!
"Are those more new shoes", they ask?
"Nah, wore them last week, just with a different skirt, so they look different.."

I feel so terrible for buying shes the way I do.

When my bubby was my age, she was in Germany, dreaming of a day when she could be sick with a fever so she could stay in her bunk instead of standing thigh deep in an icy river moving logs.

This shabbos, though, there was one of those moments of epiphany, when I just knew where I came from, and why I am in search of soles.

"Tell me bubby and zaydee what was it like preparing for your wedding?" I ask ( as we prepare for SB's big day in only 4 weeks!)

Bubby says, "there was one dress in the whole town. Of course it fit all of us, no one had too much to eat and most of us had stopped growing at 13! But it fit me like a seamstress had worked hours on it! I remember standing in the mirror, putting my hair this way and that way and smiling at the prospects, while laughing at myself for worrying about something so silly... when there was likely not going to be much to even eat at the wedding!"

My zaydee chimes in.......now my Zaydee is a big Rav ( rabbi) in a Yeshiva (great "university" of Jewish learning) let's say fashion is a topic we have almost never broached( except to tell me once that my dress was too tight across my tuchus making me not tsnius ( modest) enough to go outside!)

but suddenly, Zaydees eyes are glowing, he is smiling and brimming with the excitement he saves for his Gemara.
"I was away in yeshivah when we were engaged. I was in the American zone while Bubby was in the English zone. In the American zone we often got huge packages of worn clothing shipped from America. As a future chatan, I was given the opportunity to pick out a wardrobe for my kallah, so that we may enter the marriage home with dignity. I had only met your bubby 2 times, for an hour each before the engagement, but I sifted through those packages , I knew what would fit my beautiful kallah! I found a coat, with stitching so nice, a tailor once complemented it. There was a fur lining at the collar. And there was a knee length suit, it was brown and wool, thick for a cold winter, but with a fine hand like chashmere ( my bubby interjects, "no it was navy!!") Maybe there were 2 suits they finally agree... and there were THE SHOES.
My ears perk up...
Zaydee describes them like Staurt Weitzmann might.......
"They were navy fine leather with soles that had no scuffing at all, like brand new, they had a heel that was wooden and leather a little buckle across the back and a perfect hole at the toes to show a little toe poking out ( I think they meant 1940's peep toe shoes, very popular!)
ahh, those were THE SHOES!!! so beautiful, my lovely Hanshelle ( bubby's nick- name) was a dream in those!
Bubby says "I wore them and that fur trimmed coat off the boat when we finally got to America, they were my future, they were my hope"

and maybe this is why I too buy shoes.

like in Pirkei Avot ( I paraphrase)
"Don't judge a person till you have walked in their soul"

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

anonymity

Is a great thing.


need I say more?


SG

Monday, February 20, 2006

Blog Readership Awards!

Dearest devoted blog readers,

I wanted to thank each of you for making my blog what it is today. Without readers like you my blog would just be words floating aimlessly in the sea of blogorrhea. You devoted readers inspire me to write, because I know you will listen to me, serious or silly. So, in order of readership the awards go to:

Number one reader:
the owl in Michigan ( whether Saline, Livonia, etc...)

Number two:
someone with "fiber" (oats) at JTS

Number three:
A rock star who is "moody"

Number four:
a French chef shoe goddess in Philly

and number five:
Someone in Astoria, NY.... WHO ARE YOU???????
HAVE WE MET? I FEEL HONORED THAT YOU READ MY BLOG, BUT IS THIS STALKING???

thank you all!!


XOXOXO,
SG

INSOMNIA

I have it

3:28 AM Sunday night....

SG

Thursday, February 16, 2006

tag you're it!

yippee!

I have been "tagged" by fellow blogger in crime www.drewkaplans.blogspot.com.

Now since this is my first tag, I would like to thank my agent, the academy, my producer, that pitifull girl who gets me my morning coffee, my manicurist, hairdresser, body double, and that good looking non jewish gay male actor who will accompany me to the tag awards. oh and last but not least, my scientologist kabbalah yogi chef.

ok, so I am a little confused,
what does it mean to be tagged? must I freeze in this exact position in my chinese pajamas, furry slippers, and a slighly less furry container of leftovers in my lap?

what would US magazine say?

ok, well last I was tagged, in another sense, it was January, some local gangstas spray painted my lovely white garage with the words, "Hoody Pow, 4 ev-ah"-- thanks, makes me feel like my rent check is well worth it!

it seems that thistagging is an i -pod song list thing, and since I consider the mechanical pencil and automatic door locks on my car to be so innovative, I haven't gotten up to the i pod quite yet.

so if I had an i-pod it might play stuff by: in no order (this is slightly influenced by what I can actually sing and play on my guitar)

The Corrs
Chantal Kreviazuk
Monday Morning
Neshama Carlebach
savage garden
simon and garfunkel
eitan Katz
Shlomo Katz
Outkast
fiona apple
Shakira
Yosef Karduner
Dave Matthews
In Sync
Tori Amos
Eagle Eye Cherry
Green Day
Kelly Clarkson
sara Mclachlan
Dido
Erasure
Bob Dylan
Mary Chapin Carpenter
Michael Buble
Tracy Chapman
Vanilla Ice
Madonna
Pearl Jam
Mattisyahu
Efrat Gosh
Eidan Raichel
Rashi and the Rishonim

I am sick again

why me.
no fair.
Tommorow I will do a rapid strep test on myself and write myself a prescription if I need it ( perks)

, maybe I have mono?

maybe I have ebola?

could it be Dengue fever?

rocky mountain spotted fever?

neonatal hypoglycemia?

probably just a cold,

but it is pretty sad that because I have no time to even pee, I will never be able to go to a doctor, or a dentist, or the post office, grocery store, call back any friends while they are awake, or ever do those dishes....

now that you feel sorry for me I am going to go enjoy these fever delusions. The elephant, it is so pink! why is it raining in my kitchen? do you hear the voices too?

I'm sure your faith in medicine is only strengthened by this posting.


good shabbos,

SG

Monday, February 13, 2006

gimee some shugah, I am yoh neighbah

Alas valentines day is upon us,
the holiday where we celebrate the availability of chocolate in fashionable pink wrappers, a day in which it is perfectly acceptable to walk into CVS and grab a bunch of this gelt as "presents" and sit at home alone crunching up those cute wrappers into perfect pellets to throw at imaginary ex boyfriends. Not that I know from such things..
As luck would have it, I have never EVER been in a relationship with someone ON valentines day- to merit from a day of selfless showering of love and devotion and red velvet roses, and hideously tacky teddy bears, and of course lots of vitamin C ( chocolate)

P.s.- thanks mom for the valentines day card in 5th grade, slipped into my backpack-- the one in the red envelope that read "from your secret admirer "which lead me to believe, yes, there is hope for this nine year old, five foot two, braces flashing math club member!

Btw, did you have to crush the hope by admitting to me at my college graduation that YOU wrote it?
--I was secretly hoping that one day the admirer would show up, all grown up and pull a "Travis" ( see "Goy( boy) toy" below)...

anyway, no more pity,

this is why it is up to YOU, oh devoted readers of my blog!

Show the love!

sign my comments section below,
tell me a valentines day story, give a "shout out", or even just a sign that yes someone is actually reading my blog! You secret admirers,break out those red envelopes, it's time to pull my braids! send those spitballs flying and make my valentines day!!!



p.s. even you readers from Taiwan, Israel, Grenada, and the UAE can show the love!


XOXOXO,

SG





Saturday, February 11, 2006

kids, I don't know what's wrong with these kids today!

what has the world come to!
http://www.youtube.com/w/my-humps?v=AE-T-DoQObk&search=sherrie

nebach, my kinderlach!!!


does the birth control patch come in a barbie or elmo variety?

george washington was not Jewish

This little video might make you cry, my poor shloimy!
http://www.youtube.com/w/%5D0%5D1%5D5%5EA-%5D5%5D1%5E0%5D9%5DD?v=px5Utu0t6c0&search=jewish


mitzvah avot siman l'banim!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

sharing is caring

Ok,
since so many people told me they liked my last poem ( telling me telepathically has worked well, but commenting on the blog would be even better!)
here is another:
it is a little deep,
give it some time
maybe you will understand?

The shaved mourning midnight maiden-
but there is no funeral as she stands on the corners of Prospect and the Masses
A glistening crown globe she wears
speckled by inching growths of black ivy in this well kept garden
shorn,
protesting invisible weeds and cruel t-r-i-c-h-s
Nipped in their bud,
quickly,
before they could find a glisten of sun,
a breeze to catch their strand and carry their
INTENT!
Had she noticed the maiden mourning the midnight beyond Prospect,
in the Masses?
in the sky
colored headwrap
to enshroud the horrors of her crown
of the rotting fruits of healing hands (much like mine)
we mean no harm, first do no harm,
but we have planted a longing in her four fair chambers
for far less invisible,
the quite welcome weeds to sprout from her barren garden globe
to protest,
before She,
like a cruel T-r-i-c-k is nipped in her bud,
quickly,
never finding her glisten of sun,
a breeze to catch her stranded
to carry on her life's intent.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

how to bake a poem (the title of my first poem, SG, age 4)

feeling all creative: here is my latest poem,

His Brave Last Days (magazine article title)

is facing death brave?
is death a challange to stand strong against,
to test one's will?
something that takes courage?

brave

we learned,
hakovesh et yitsro!
is it so much one's desire to cease?
must it be something overcome?
are we implying that it is within our will,
within our feeble cries, pleas and withering dance
that we can somehow change the trajectory of God?
did others just give up,
were they not
brave
to merely be

arms crossed on sternum
stillness in silence
eyes at half mast
rhythmic slowing of breaths, afterthoughts
bravely
singing an internal hymn of acceptance
shma yisrael, Hashem, Elokeinu, Hashem
Echad

SG 2/06

Sunday, February 05, 2006

are you stalking to me?

stalker? biggest fan? or new boyfriend for SG? you decide!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks5SUx1eyFU

Friday, February 03, 2006

Kisshka my Tuchus!

Shanda!

look who is such a wanabee!

ttp://myspace.com/hasidichiphop

ok, he is good though...

wouldn't it be funny if Mattisyahu auditioned for American Idol?

confusciosowitz says...

Do not say when I am free I will pursue wisdom, perhaps you will never be free...

The Talmud


This is a motivator for me to look beyond the mundane, it is a good kick in the tuchus to pursue truth.
It is, however, a double edge sword,
while I believe I am pursuing wisdom, maybe I am just a prisoner of my goals?
will I ever have that moment's rest to fill my lungs with non stagnant air and think about what the future might hold? or will my constant desire for freedom from the everyday keep me chained? eternally?

and no this was not written by the aid of any psychotropic medications!

There is depth greater than the lines at the Macys after holidays sale.